Charching the battery

I decided to try and make more pictures with a story,

and this one is all about my flat battery.

When I discovered last Friday that my battery had not enough power to start my bike it felt like part of me. My energy levels has been very low the last few month. In the beginning I still had the energy but the passion was lacking. I ended up with neither and that is where all the trouble started.

If you don't have the energy or the passion, there is no reason to live. Thank god I still had a pilot light burning somewhere deep inside. Otherwise I might have lost my last, ever so small, positive view of the world. But I did not really care about anything in my live anymore. Drink to much, smoke to much, who cares, if it kills me it's just fine. I was even scared to walk next to a railway not knowing what I was about to do.

Being so empty you would think that you don't feel anything, but the emotional pain was unbearable. I wished I had something broken or other physical pain, but no there is no easy solution for these kind of pains. And it's hard to explain to the outside world what it is and how it feels since you don't see anything. So whenever I'm around other people I'm putting on my mask and emotionally hide behind a big brick wall. That's the way I'm raised so I do not know any better. But once at home the tears started running.

The rest I was given, gave me back some of the energy. But then the search for help ain't an easy task and I'm still not sure if I found it. You end up doing things yourself again, and I felt like being back to where I started many times. That, on it's own cost a lot of energy, the energy you do not have.

I know I had Tori Teriyaki last week, today it was a Teriyaki burger. It was kind of fun to make and it tasted very good. And no, this is not all I eat, I normally take seconds and yes I made two of those burgers.
The only trouble I had was that I wanted to use the stir-fry vegetables I had in my refrigerator, but by the time the burgers where almost ready and I wanted to stir-fry, I saw that they where not any good anymore. So I had to quickly cook some chinese cabbage instead.